The High Price of Authenticity
Mobile Food Truck Rodeo A couple of years ago, I was in an Olympia grocery co-op, when I heard a commotion behind me. “Oh my goodness, you’re so BEAUTIFUL!” I looked around, and I saw a middle-aged...
View ArticleR.I.P. Downtown Seattle Ride-Free Zone
Today is the end of an era. The 40 year-old Downtown Seattle Ride-Free Zone is no moe. I can hear it now: “Yay! It’s about time those free-loadin’ nigras, homeless people, and all around losers start...
View ArticlePicture: A Sailboat
“You’ll get sick of it!”, they tell me, “I promise, you’ll get sick of it quick!” I’m in my sixth month of daily ferry commuting, and honestly, I don’t know that I’d have it any other way. Were my...
View ArticleHilloween 2012
Hilloween – Recess Monkey Concert Yesterday, “Hilloween” (Capitol Hill Halloween) was once again celebrated in Cal Anderson Park. Kids aged 1-51 got freebies from local businesses, played games, and...
View ArticleThe Pike Grocery Grand Opening (and a Pissed-Off Rant About Nothing in...
Pike Grocery at Pike and Boren Yesterday was an exciting day for yours truly. It’s a day I had been eagerly awaiting for months. Yesterday, Pike Grocery finally opened its doors, and as soon as my...
View ArticleNew Year’s Eve 2013
The Space Needle on NYE You know, sometimes I envy suburban tourists. I truly do. After all, they don’t have to wait 10 minutes each way for an elevator when they leave their homes; don’t have to smell...
View ArticleHappy Thanksgiving from Seattle
Maybe next year you should go to Portland, though. Either that or leave the Accura SUV thing back at home. I feel conflicted when I see scenes like this, and for whatever reason, I’m starting to...
View ArticleA One Horse Open Sleigh
Nothing says “Happy Birthday, Jesus!” quite like walking down to Westlake Park and hailing a horse. And so, on Christmas Eve, I did. I still remember the previous time I rode in a carriage. I was about...
View ArticleStrange Days
I should have known that things were a bit screwy when I passed the couple rolling enormous joints. There they sat, a male and a female, on a bench, near the entrance to Freeway Park, rolling big, fat...
View ArticleNever Again! (okay, maybe again)
All hail the liberation of Pike-Pine! The BMW Concentration Camp, where thousands upon thousands of good, upstanding people were sentenced to years upon years of hard douchebaggery, is finally coming...
View ArticleBullseye
I had my doubts, but it looks as though Target really is planning to open a Downtown Seattle store in the near future. The windows are being prepped and everything. Apparently, it will be called “City...
View ArticleDowntown Seattle ‘City Target’ Update
Downtown Seattle City Target I know, I know, department store updates aren’t sexy, and most people don’t understand what the big deal is, but Downtown Seattle’s new “City Target” is somewhat of a big...
View ArticleI’m on a Boat
I once entertained the thought of moving to Bremerton. It was a fleeting thought, but a thought nonetheless. The reason the notion crossed my mind wasn’t so much my love for Bremerton, but rather, the...
View ArticleA Note About Seattle’s Violent Crime Wave
It’s an unfortunate statement to make, but I’m used to violent crime. Over the course of my life, I’ve lived in Washington DC, New York City, Los Angeles, Las Vegas, and Seattle. In each of these...
View ArticleThe Seattle Aquarium
“World-Class” It’s a term that is invoked quite often in Seattle, and it’s a term that draws equal amounts approval and ire from the city’s inhabitants. Most of the approval comes from real estate...
View ArticleAir Sicko
Earlier this year, a friend of mine was rushed to Harborview Hospital. To protect his anonymity, and for the sake of clarity, let’s call my friend ‘Doug Thatcher Tha Booty Snatcher’. Now, the reason...
View ArticleCyclist Memorial at Pike & Boren
Nap Cantwell Memorial at Pike & Boren On this spot, last week, another cyclist was killed by an automobile driver. His name was Nap Cantwell. I actually heard this collision take place, and I’ve...
View ArticleDefending Spike: The Cultural Genocide of Gentrification
It looks like Spike Lee has gotten himself into a bit of hot water. Last week he had some not-too-kind words for the ex-suburbanites who have taken over his childhood neighborhood. You can read about...
View ArticleEvolution Aborted
Chronological Adults in Cal Anderson Park My kid just came back from a birthday party, and I am perplexed. The party was cool enough, and everyone seemed to have fun, however, when my daughter began...
View ArticleSued by the SPD
“Why is the SPD always involved in controversy?” I was asked this question about a month ago by someone visiting the city. They were both concerned and intrigued by the amount of national notoriety...
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