You’ve Been Hit By … You’ve Been Struck By …
Finding parking during rush hour in Downtown Seattle is a pain in the ass. It’s one of the many reasons I don’t drive. That and, you know, climate change, the thing car drivers are always wagging...
View ArticleSeattle Mayor Ed Murray Escalates War on the Poor
When a city has people living on its streets in poverty and squalor, one might surmise that correcting this would be the top priority of that city’s Democratic Party. One would be right if that city...
View ArticleAnother Dispatch from the Streets of MEattle
Who looks exactly the way that I look? Me! When I am reading, who’s holding the book? Me! When I want dinner, who always will feed me? Who’s always handy whenever I need me? Firm as a feather in all...
View ArticleWatch Your Back, Fool
In some cities, it’s a sign that you’re in gang territory. In others, it’s a place to buy drugs. In Seattle, if you spot shoes hanging over a wire, you know with certainty that you’re in a...
View ArticleConcrete Barriers Necessary: Only in Seattle
KinderCare with Barricades What you see above, is concrete barriers outside of a KinderCare in Midtown Seattle. A few months ago, an automobile failed to stop, and it plowed right through the plate...
View ArticleTest Your Seattle IQ
Q. What do you call the painted lines at city intersections where pedestrians are designated to walk? A. Parking Spaces When a friend of mine moved here about 3 years ago, this was one of the first...
View ArticleA Tale of Two Cities
This week, the Seattle Police Department repeatedly removed low-income and homeless campers from their adopted spot next to the I-5 express lanes, just off of Pike Street. This is a strip of land in an...
View ArticleNouns, Motherfucker! We Got Nouns! And Prepositions Too, Biyiyatch!
Upper-Middle-Class Caucasians love their slogans. Boy oh boy do they love their slogans. Especially ones written on walls in random places. Much like pissy notes on car windshields, a phenomenon as...
View ArticleThe Beach, Some Dogs, and My Broken Ankle
Factually Accurate Sign When you get down to it, I’m a liberal guy. I support abortion, gay rights, universal healthcare, true civil rights equality, rent control, increased rights for the poor and...
View ArticleCollision at 6th & Stewart
Note that cars continue to run red lights even after the collision. I will ask for your forgiveness in advance for this post. I’m still very shaken up. I’m still very angry. I’m still very...
View ArticleEver Wonder What it Would Look Like?
If the children of the 1% piled into your city, called themselves “progressives”, then proceeded to elect 1%er after 1%er to public office while railing against the evils of the 1%? Did you ever wonder...
View ArticleThe Strange Life of a Seattle Pedestrian
Daily Occurrence What you see above is not an exception. It’s the rule. On most days, when walking to or from work during rush hours, the majority of intersections are blocked by...
View ArticleCleaning House in Pike/Pine
In what is a semi-daily occurrence at this point, Value Village, thrift store made famous by Macklemore, and longtime haunt of yours truly, closed last week. While I used to get annoyed by this type...
View ArticleWhy?
For a “liberal” city, we sure have a lot of BMWs, Lexuses, and other vehicles the price of which could end homelessness in this city. Like climate change, someone else is always supposed to make the...
View ArticleFirst Glimpses of the First Hill Streetcar
I’m not sure when opening day will be, but the trains themselves are rolling. Kind of exciting if I must say so.
View ArticleSpecific Dolphin
General Porpoise Donuts Extended adolescence. It’s all the rage these days. And instead of shaking my fist at the infantile suburban tourists who pass through Seattle on their post-collegiate...
View ArticleSo, How’d The Test Go?
Never mind, the wet sign lying in a puddle of dirty water tells us all we need to know about the results of this test. Not that we needed a test to tell us anything. Seattle is a town where dogs go to...
View ArticleAnswering a Seattle Police Officer’s Question
“Why don’t you use the crosswalk!”, bellowed the Seattle Police Officer moonlighting as security for the Paramount Theater. My companion and I looked at each other with incredulity, before both...
View ArticleOnly in Seattle …….. aaaand Maybe West Virginia
Rare are the times one glances out the window of a city bus and spots a goat on the hood of a Ford Minivan. Unless that bus happens to be meandering through the backroads of West by-God Virginia, or,...
View ArticleWelcome to Seattle. Now Go Home.
Mixed feelings. On one hand, I don’t like to see people’s property vandalized. I’m an empathetic human-being and I don’t enjoy seeing harm, or even disappointment, inflicted upon other people. It...
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